Dr. Lee: And so I encourage, men, fathers, we need to be the first example. We need to lead by example. So yes, you want to, you want to encourage your kids, you want to do these things, but you're still living. You still have a dream.
Yes, we're doing things for our children. One of the best things I believe we could do for our children is to live our dreams. That is one of the best things we can do because that opens up a door and it allows them to go after. And then it also, when it comes to entrepreneurship when it comes to work ethic when it comes to making things a priority.
You teach by example.
Dr. Ijani: Hello. Welcome to the Dadpuzzles podcast. You are listening to episode number two with our first special guest, Dr. Clarence M Lee, Jr. Dr. Lee is a physician, entrepreneur, nationally celebrated author, international speaker, and the president and CEO of Exhort Health, whose vision is to change everything about healthcare.
A former student-athlete, Dr. Lee, holds a degree in biology from University of the Incarnate Word and degrees in medicine and business from Drexel University. Also a decorated war veteran. Dr. Lee served in the United States Air Force For 10 years with, uh, several assignments, his last being a flight surgeon flying the T-38 and U- 2 airframes in one of the most elite squadrons in the United States Air Force.
Dr. Lee is the author of the Inspirational Memoir, Well, my mom says, as well as his latest book. P e r s i s t. He is the columnist, uh, for several publications, and, uh, his work has been featured in Live Happy Magazine, Black Fitness Today, and Essence Magazine to name, a few. He regularly appears as an on-air TV health expert and has been featured in segments on ABC, CBS, and Fox Television.
Recently, Dr. Lee was named Top 40 under 40 by the Sacramento Business Journal and Drexel University. He has been highlighted as one of the top healthcare entrepreneurs to know by Baker's Hospital Review. One of the top black entrepreneurs to follow by Yahoo Finance and is also a recent recipient of the uh, Black Enterprise Modern Man Award.
Dr. Lee is a devoted husband and father, and, leaves in Southern California, and loves spending time with his wife and five children. Without further ado, I would like to welcome Dr. Lee. Please welcome.
Dr. Lee: Thanks for having me. I'm excited to be on and add some value to the dads.
Dr. Ijani: I am humbled and honored to have you, sir. Uh, what is your view of fatherhood?
Dr. Lee: Yeah, so I think something that's germane to this conversation is, I didn't grow up with my dad. So, my parents divorced when I was five and, I felt, a lot of pain growing up that my dad wasn't around. I had a stepdad that came into my life, when I was about 9 or 10, and he made a massive impact on my life.
But my view of fatherhood and my idea of what a dad is supposed to be was really shaped by the fact that I didn't have my dad around a lot when I was younger. So my motivations for pretty much the majority of what I do, my intentions in business are really to be able to leave a legacy for my children.
So instead of only being, I say only, but instead of just stopping at employment, Having an employer, I desire to be able to pass on something to my children, and that's the main reason why I went into entrepreneurship. I left my job to start my own organization. I desire to be present.
So being an entrepreneur also allows me the flexibility of my schedule so that I can make priorities a priority so I don't, necessarily have to ask for time off to go and see my son's soccer game or football game. I just put it on the calendar and I'm there. So the fact that I did not have my dad when I was younger has really driven me to create the things that I have created and to also be a success, to be something because I wanted my children to be proud that I was their dad, but to also be able to give them something and to allow them a life that was different than my life. So growing up with a single mom, I didn't really grow up with a lot. And times when my parents were together, and then I'll finish up with this, but when my parents were together, we had a traditional family.
My dad worked, but my mom didn't work. And I remember when my parents were together, I had toys and clothes, and my dad bought gold chains. And I just had so many things. And let me tell you, when my parents divorced, when my dad left, we lost everything. And so in my mind, that livelihood and that lifestyle were equated to my father being around.
So really growing up, I have to start with that story… That's really what made me into who I am and which has given me the motivation and the intention and the drive. All from what I went through growing up.
Dr. Ijani: So at what age, did your parents divorce?
Dr. Lee: Five. I was five years old. Yeah.
Dr. Ijani:  Okay.
Can you share about, your stepdad?
Dr. Lee:  Yeah, so in my first book, the title, my first book was well, my mom says, actually, that entire book is about my mom, but I dedicate one chapter to my stepdad, to this man. His name was Willie. He's still around. I just, I just literally talked to him a couple of days ago. We're, still really, really close.
But one of the things that I learned from him was to believe in myself and I just never had a male spend so much time with me. He, I mean, I don't even wanna get emotional talking about this guy, I wasn't his kid, but he spent a lot of time with me. And that time he spent it built something in me and I didn't know I had it until he showed me it was. And so when I talk about dad and I talk about this, man, I'm telling you the impact and the impact that you have is unbelievable.
And so for him, he changed my life, and it was really just spending time with me. He didn't owe me anything, he was interested in my mom, you know what I mean? Like, I just came with the package, but, I know the power of time. I know the power of encouragement. I know the power of seeding into somebody and, you might just think, I'm gonna go and throw the baseball with them.
But, I never had anybody do that with me. Massive. Massive. And, and so yeah, just little things like that and, you know, spending time with me, encouraging me, teaching me how to play sports, you know, just from that sports foundation just built so much inside of me and I took that and I took it and I ran with it brother.
But he was an amazing man and, he is an amazing man. And, he changed my life.
Dr. Ijani:  What advice do you give to dads? What kind of advice would you like to share with dads?
Dr. Lee: I know for me, I had people in my life that as I was growing up that told me, I can do anything. They told me, hey, you can do whatever you want to do with your life. You can do this, you can do that but I didn't see them doing it. So it's one thing for you to tell a kid, but if you're not an example of it, then that led me to ask, why aren't you living your dream?
Okay, so you're telling me I can live my dream. You're telling me I can do this stuff. You're telling me I can do it. I wanna see somebody that's doing it. And so, I decided at one point, that I just encourage men. I decided at one point that, you know what? I'm gonna be the first example to my children of living your dream.
So you're not gonna have to go and read a book. You're not gonna have to go and, watch a movie. You're gonna get to see right in your house, somebody living their dream. So when I turn around and I tell my daughter, Sweetheart, you can do whatever you want. You can live your dream of what you want to do, what is your dream?
You can make that happen. She believes it. Because she's watching me do it. And so I encourage, men, and fathers, we need to be the first example. We need to lead by example. So yes, you want to, you want to encourage your kids, you want to do these things, but you're still living. You still have a dream.
Yes, we're doing things for our children. One of the best things I believe we could do for our children is to live our dreams. That is one of the best things we can do because that opens up a door and it allows them to go after. And then it also, when it comes to entrepreneurship when it comes to work ethic when it comes to making things a priority.
You teach by example. You can talk about it, but them watching me, my kids watching me close my business to go and do something with them, they watch me do that. And so in their minds, this is what's expected, right? Because they're watching that. And so when I talk to my kids. I own my company, so they talk about organizing a business, having employees, payroll, they talk about that stuff and so they get to see it and they also get to talk about it, and it's kind of a part of their life, you know? So I encourage, guys, I encourage men specifically, and I believe we owe it, and I challenge.
Go out there and live your dreams because you're showing your children that it's possible. You're not just telling them, you're showing them that you have what it takes. It's not gonna be easy. There's gonna be ups and downs, but your kids need to see that too. It's not smooth sailing, it's not top of the top, all the time.
They need to see that as well. And so show them.
Dr. Ijani: Actually they might, not get it at a young age, but as they grow and they get to understand the concept of, employer and employee, then they will come to, appreciate what dad has been going through, to make it happen for them.
Dr. Lee: Absolutely. I think my younger ones, might not completely get it. My six-year-old might not be, my eight-year-old I think he does, but absolutely my 16-year-old does. She will tell you. She tells people she noticed the difference. You are also showing your children that they are a priority.
What they want to do is a big deal to you. They matter. And so there are so many layers to it. And I'm not saying everybody needs to be an entrepreneur or whatever I'm saying be true to your dream, be true to what you want to do. If you're doing what you wanna do, great.
Whatever that is. But it was my vision, to be an entrepreneur and, work for myself and, so I, you owe it to you. So I tell men, fathers, you owe it to yourself and you also owe it to your family to, leave a legacy for your children's children. I believe that in my heart of hearts, I'm a Christian, so, you know, I read the Bible and one of the verses for the Bible is, a good man leaves, an inheritance to his children's children.
And so I, I'm trying to be, a good man. Mm-hmm.
Dr. Ijani:  Mothers are very important that I know, actually in Islam. They say that Heaven is underneath the feet of our mothers. So, absolutely Mothers are very important.
Dr. Lee: I'll run, I'll run through a brick wall. I'll run through a brick wall for my mom. There's, there's not, there's no. There's not a person that's gonna get to my mom. I mean, she was everything, you know what I mean? And, so I tell, young guys, I grew up with just her most of the time.
And man, I'll do anything for my mom. I'll do anything for my mom. And, I honor her. I honor her, and she knows that I have her, you know, anything going on with my mom, it's… I take that as understood. Mothers are amazing.
Dr. Ijani: So what are your best ideas for the best dad?
Dr. Lee:Â I'll tell you what, makes me feel, the best and, that is just having fun. You know, I think me, we as men and my wife has to remind me of this, and I'm not completely, I'm not like awesome at this all the time, but the times that make me feel the best is when, I'm having fun and, you know, I've got a prior military background.
I've been deployed, I grew up in kind of crazy areas sometimes I didn't really have a lot. And so, sometimes when I'm out with my family, I go. Protective mode. And so, you know, I've got my wife, I've got my five kids, I'm responsible. I'm like, God, not on my watch. Like nothing about to happen to my family.
I have to remind myself, just to have fun. I've placed my kids in a place that is safe and, to have fun, but those are the times I would just encourage fathers just have fun. I mean, there's a place to obviously, teach and instruct and, discipline and all those things have their place.
But many times we will sacrifice the fun that I can tell from my own personal experience. I had to remind myself, Hey, just have some fun, man. So that is where I'm at right now. That's the number one thing I would tell fathers is just have fun.
The kids already want to have fun. That's auto, that's on autopilot for them. We have to remind ourselves, to relax, have a good time, and chill out. That's what I would tell dads is yes, our role is important, but also our kids want to have fun with us.
Dr. Ijani: Actually when you have more than one child, you definitely have to be busier, entertaining them at, their different levels, Stopping the fights, etc. When you're spending time with them, there's no boredom.
Dr. Lee: That's absolutely true. And, many times it's meeting them where they're at. So all of my kids do different things for fun. One of my sons likes to throw football. Another one of my sons likes to play baseball. My daughter likes to go to breakfast and eat, you know, so it's whatever that kid needs. Just meet 'em where they're at and, have fun.
Dr. Ijani:Â So, what are the exciting times or the fondest memories of your dad? What would you like to share about that?
Dr. Lee:  Yeah, with my dad, he has a very, easy-going mannerism about him. He's always smiling. He loves children. So if you, see him now, he's, smiling, you know, always having kind of a good time type of guy. And so I remember growing up getting to spend time with him. That's what I remember the most having fun.
And I, that's probably why I talk about having fun with my kids because that's what I remember. the most exciting time with my dad was having fun. But yeah, my dad was always kind of smiling. When we did get to hang out, he always kind of made space for the children, always kind of made light and had fun and so those are, some of the most memorable times, are just when we were just hanging out, having fun.
Dr. Ijani:  Thank you Dr. Lee for spending time with me. I truly appreciate you, sharing your wisdom, and I look forward to speaking with you again at some point. You are always welcome to come back.
Dr. Lee:Â Oh, absolutely. I had a great time. I appreciate you having me.
You too, take care now. Bye bye.
Dr. Ijani:  Thank you.
That was a great chat with, Dr. Lee. He shares his wisdom, on LinkedIn as well, so give him a follow. If you, happen to connect with him, you'll see that he's very active with encouraging. folks, about entrepreneurship and, productivity.
So I was very lucky to have him as, my very first guest. So please, don't forget to, Subscribe and share the link, in terms of YouTube, and, share this podcast with your friends so we can have more listeners and, uh, go to the website as well and provide your information there so we can update you with any other postings we have online that is outside, the podcast. Please feel free to comment on what we spoke about. I'll be very happy to, address, some of your, likes and/or concerns.
Thank you so much. I'll talk to you soon.
