Babies will change your relationship with your partner, that’s a fact. For many couples it can seem like a difficult time as you both adjust to new ways of living, but it’s possible to find your groove again.
Here are some of the ways your relationship will change after the baby is born, and how to work around these problems for a better relationship.
Tiredness
You’ll both be tired, all the time. Babies take a lot of work and they don’t follow a typical sleeping schedule. The result is a lack of sleep for both parents, which can have an impact on lots of other things.
If you notice normal daily duties slipping, such as cleaning, eating, and so on, be sure to correct this. One way to do so is to sleep whenever possible, such as during the day while baby is napping.
You might find one parent needs to sleep in a separate room to catch up. Don’t take offense at this; at this point in your relationship, remaining functioning human beings is more important than sleeping together.
Lack of socializing
Whether it’s that one of you has given up work or you’re not able to go out in the evenings, your social life will slowly slip away. This is a widely recognized side effect of being new parents and can be a serious problem if not corrected.
If one of you has given up work, be sure they can still see people. Invite friends round; go to baby classes, meet up for a coffee, anything to get you out of the house. Becoming a stay-at-home parent can feel like a loss of identity, so do everything possible to find it again.
Your relationship
The physical aspect of your relationship will definitely take a hit after childbirth. Whether it’s because of exhaustion, bodily changes, or something else, many women find it difficult to be intimate with their partner after having a baby.
It’s your job as the husband to understand this and to let her take the lead. Let her know that it’s her decision when sex happens, but think of other ways to show your physical affection until she’s ready.
Communication
There’s nothing more important than communication in any relationship, especially after a baby has come into the world. Lack of sleep combined with stress can lead to tense words and snappy responses.
Acknowledge when this happens and resume the conversation when you’re both calm. Listen to your partner and how they feel and show that you’re listening. Most importantly, never criticize what your partner is doing or how they feel. Criticism is never constructive, and will only enflame a situation.
Conclusion
The most important thing for your relationship after baby has come along is to make time for just the two of you. Sure, this will be difficult, but it’s incredibly important.
Something as simple as enjoying a film together or spending some time out of the house will work wonders for your relationship. Just bear in mind it’ll never be what it was, but it can be something better.
